Pleasant Getting Old
"Two hills my gluteus maximus!" Perhaps that hill count was misleading, Gopher? Two hills not yet pedaled this season may have been a more accurate description for the Rockin to Roxbury route. 2400 feet of climbing over two hills would have been par for the Tour de France, and suitable for our polka dot jersey rider, LuLu. It is no coincidence that Gopher chose gluteus maximus as the title for his Strava post, as butts were the hot topic of conversation, in a purely physiological sense. There is no butt shaming allowed, though marginalized butts observations (Vilker) are fair game. The metric was less about W/kg and more about W/glute. Power from the backside is a thing of beauty, and the main reason that skinny jeans should be banished.
A sole Drafter broke away from the peloton (left an hour early) and rocked Roxbury without being caught. Dan-yelly will look stunning in the yellow jersey.
The B for Bad Ass team had full roster. Midas showed up thinking this was the JV team, but soon realized this group is anything "butt". Pipes came prepared with two pairs of glasses: one to block the sun and the other to read the map. This is a dramatic improvement from a few years back when she forgot her glasses, water bottle and front wheel. Nitro came equipped with a medical kit full of anti-bonk remedies. Medical records are HIPAA protected, but all suspect that Pipes finished the Draft thanks to our staff anesthesiologist.
The A team (this could go so many ways with the butt theme and B standing for Bad Ass, but let's keep it clean) had a slower start with Skipper coming in hot (who knew you could do a tail whip on a road bike?) and without water bottles. Vilks, leaving no Drafter dehydrated, scrambled into the house to fill up Skipper's borrowed bottles (hence missing from the starting line up photo), leaving his sunglasses by the sink and spending another few minutes hunting the down. He should have taken a page out of Pipes' book and brought two pair.
Vilks, BrickO, LuLu and Skipper were late out of the gate. Following the Drafter code, the A Team soft pedaled until the foursome caught up before the ascent to Ashton. To be clear, that ascent was not one of the two hills on the tour.
Despite the blue skies, Booker J's new bike was rumbling like angry thunder. "I had the chain waxed two years ago", says the man who still has the screen sticker still on his Garmin so that the same faux data appears every ride.
Dunlap Hollow was one of the two formidable hills on the route. Skipper captured the anticipation of the Drafters rounding the bend, and the agony of the climb.
With 10 miles left to go, both Drafter groups merged and came to rest before the final climb on Woodland (nope, not one of the two advertised climbs), ironically at the cemetery.
The post-draft draft was wonderfully void of Strava segment downloads, although we were all in awe of the purple heat Blurple rained down on Hwy V for Victory. Vintage was in hot pursuit, but clearly his leg hair hygiene game was off (compounded by his post-WORS race legs from Sunday).
Granny, our dermatologist on call, has been kept busy with all sorts of Drafter skin and hair issues. While helping BrickO keep hers from falling out, Vintage has solicited her help in having his legs achieve the same smoothness as Vilker's. Smooth legs may be Vilker's jam, but his "paramecium" is growing, along with his mustache envy.
Cycling Events: Hope to see many of you this Saturday for the Boys and Girls Club ride from McKee Farms. Sign up for the BrickO's Drafters team, which gets you nothing in the way of swag, but tons in the way of camaraderie. The Drafters also have a team lined up for The Lake Ripley Ride on Saturday, July 30. There are rumors of a party to follow at an undisclosed cabin location on the lake.
The Dirty Draft hasn't had much traction with organized rides, but it is great to see so many Drafters getting dirty. And Vintage is shredding the WORS series!
HAPPY BIRTHDAYS this week to Speedy and Special K! And happy BIRTH to E$ and Cookie Monster as they welcome our newest Drafter.
The July 18 route is tentatively Pleasant Getting Old, a 40 mile tour of the west. Wheels up with water bottles filled and sunglasses (and readers, if needed) secured at 5:30PM. It will require recon as some of the roads were chip sealed a few weeks ago. Check GroupMe for updates should the route need to be rerouted. 5PM SHORT POUR: knock off the most westerly loop, which is ~8 miles. Stay on JJ, skipping the right turn onto Blue Mounds Trail (the road in question for chip seal), and returning on Vermont Church Rd.
RidewithGPS link to Pleasant Getting Old
Cue sheet PDF
Draft responsibly,
BrickO