Spring (finally) Valley
The Drafter scribe is currently unavailable, purportedly packing feverishly for an early departure to Italy. Underscore feverishly, as two negative home Covid tests and a negative PCR test have not explained the 8 days of symptoms. While green is her favorite color, this is taking things a bit too far. Apparently, only Supreme Court Justices are able to call in antibiotic favors, which is why the Drafter scribe made off with Special K's water bottles in hopes of sipping some medicine. The scribe also made off with three of Octane''s espresso porters and two coconut chocolate gluten free brownies, so the healing is bound to begin. So, this post will be brief and to the point. And most likely include an abundance of typos. Please be kind.
25 Drafters, including two newbies, faced the Formidable Festge, many donning their fabulous new Hincapie kits celebrating our 10 YEAR DRAFTING RESPONSIBLY ANNIVERSARY! The group was a bit discombobulated from the start, with four Drafters going rouge at 4:30PM. Nothing like a little head start to make more time for drinking beer. Pipes was struggling with her Garmin. Apparently, the course she loaded last week recommended making a U-turn throughout the entire route. Special K ate all her snacks while waiting for Pipes to upload the route. Draft responsibly. While these four were early, Slow Cow was late to the Draft. Like 3 years late. Somehow he didn't get the memo that we moved the start from the Free House to our house in 2019. No matter. He needed to recover after conquering Italy Divide.
In addition to the Rogue Group, there was a short pour for two!
The 5:15 group had the usual suspects, and some new suspects. Tick Tock brought his significant other. Riding out of town, BrickO commented on how svelte he looked (this is sensitive territory as Tick Tock is more than just eye candy), and he responded that his girlfriend had him on a strict workout routine. "I may look like a Cadillac, but I drive like a Model T". Welcome to the Draft, Sargent. It appears you have Tick Tock at full salute. Our second newbie found out about the draft several years ago when she and BrickO were both at Middleton High School dropping off forgotten items for their respective children, while wearing cycling jerseys. It took her awhile to enlist, and we are happy to have her. Welcome Nemo (her Trek has shark teeth on the top tube, but she is a softer soul than Jaws, and finally found her way- or maybe it was Dory who got lost in Finding Nemo? Anyway).
Pitstop showed up early for the B Team, eager to reclaim her Strava segment from the driveway to the bathroom. It looks like she has more competition from Special K in the field segment.
The B Team picked up Duracell near Blackhawk, where there was also a Super Q sighting on KP, riding her mountain bike. Vintage was curiously lurking at Blackhawk, an odd spot to wait for the A team to arrive. His porn stache is hard to miss. There was dissension in the ranks at Cleveland and Deer Run, hills known to bring Drafters to tears. When in doubt, CLIMB. That's the Drafter motto, and apparently only BrickO was in doubt. Oddly, after the Deer Run descent and before the Cleveland Climb, BrickO and Cujo traded frothy smiles. A solo B+ drafter, perhaps?
The A Team was in full assault mode. Granny, still riding her 40 pound Bianchi, after failing to have it stolen earlier in the day when she left it unlocked at Lakeview Park, and carrying Squirrel's water bottles, claimed the QOM crown on Deer Run. Blurple was quick to ease BrickO's pain of losing the coveted crown by pointing out that 1) Granny is much younger than 73, and 2) it wasn't even close, so there's no point in trying to reclaim the crown. And so it goes.
Octane played a pivotal role in preparing Granny to claim the QOM, carefully protecting her from the headwind with his massive calves. "Ya know, it would be so much better if these massive muscles could be used for cycling." He also leveraged his position in the draft with the promise of brownies. Like his calves, not to be underrated.
Octane was the only one who delivered. As he ran low on fuel during the climb up Deer Run, Vintage encouraged him to "just keep climbing. I've got Swedish Fish to get you through the bonk." Only he didn't. The only thing Vintage delivered on was his stache. Skipper, his beard freshly shaven 8 hours before the draft, left a little something behind.
The mustache mystery is a fun one to solve. Here's another: there is a new Drafter coming in November 2022. A dozen of Octane's brownies for the Drafter who can guess the lucky couple!
Next week's route will take the Drafters through scenic Enchanted and Spring Valleys. NOTICE (Slow Cow): the route will start near Lakeview Park (see GroupMe for the address). Thanks to LuLu and Columbus for hosting. NOTE (Slow Cow): the map and GPS note Glacier Ridge Road, so start your Garmin but realize it won't find the course until you are on Airport Rd. NOTICE (Slow Cow): There is NO DRAFT ON MEMORIAL DAY.
RidewithGPS link Spring Valley
For those seeking a short pour, please find solace in the Pine Loop. Turn left on Pine off of Spring Valley, and then left on KP. From there, follow the cue sheet above to return safely to Middleton.
Draft responsibly,
BrickO